Banana Island Ghost

Banana Island Ghost

I’ll start by saying that Banana Island was a good attempt at a romantic comedy especially for a Nollywood movie. Sadly, it didn’t live up to a lot of expectations but managed to leave a good taste in our mouths nonetheless.

The visuals were a breath of fresh air and a lot of thought went into the aerial shots and angles that spoke of superb cinematography. The music by Nigerian artists definitely served as major highlights and helped fill in the blanks when necessary. Some of the songs that were definitely worth hearing again were Kale Ni by Ruby Gyang and Empty by Cobhams.

 

The movie’s flaws however were mostly as a result of empty dialogue and a story with more holes than a basket. This caused the Banana Island Ghost to have pacing issues and trivialized a lot of its highlights.download-22-

The film felt more like a collection of moments than a well thought out story and the inconsistencies and lack of buildup in the film caused it to fall flat in the wrong places.

That said, the Banana Island Ghost definitely scored an ‘A’ for effort and comedy with Akah Nnani sending us into peels of laughter and proving that all it takes is skill and commitment to pull off a memorable performance.

Character-Poster-Serge

Patrick Diabuah was a sight for sore eyes and even though the movie did him little justice he still managed to give a stellar performance. Unfortunately, Chigurl’s character came off a tad bit confusing due to the various accent changes and the insincerity of her emotions during the particularly emotional scenes. It felt like she was playing multiple characters instead of one but the huge let down for me was her singing, particularly because I’ve heard her do way better.

Saheed Balogun managed to hold his end quite well and Makeeda Moka the Naija Ninja didn’t do too badly either.

Though a mesh of highs and lows, Banana Island Ghost takes credit for being a good attempt at what could’ve been an outstanding film.

Rating: 2.5 out of 5

Listen to

Kale Ni by Ruby Gyang http://smarturl.it/RubyGyangKaleNi

Empty by Cobhams http://tooxclusive.com.ng/wp-content/uploads/2017/02/Cobhams_Asuquo_-_Empty_tooxclusive.com.ng.mp3

 

 

Deaf: To Blow or Not to Blow

‘My guy this artiste go blow?’
‘Yes oh e go blow’
Two months later…
‘My guy that artiste nko?’
‘E neva blow oh!’

I fell in love with Eva’s ‘Deaf’ the first day I heard it, I’ve always been a fan of hers, so obviously the moment I found a cover of the same song by Boogey, I downloaded it but somehow never got round to listening to it until this morning and all I kept thinking was ‘ouch’.

I will not go into the various versions of the original story of Eva’s ‘near success syndrome’ , this isn’t about her but about the business of entertainment.
You wan blow?

My people, artiste management is not a prison cell, it’s a means to an end. I won’t dispute that some companies prey on the ignorance of their artistes but please, high is the price of ignorance, educate yourself.
No matter how good your talent, unless you have an unlimited supply of cash flowing from some unknown/known source like our ever-evolving Davido, omo mehn you can like to calm down for Jesus and get signed sharply.

Labels/Managements etc are there to give meaning and structure to your talent while you sit back and do what you were born to do and make money while you’re at it. If you like money too much then biko, get a lawyer to break down your contract to you so you know what you’re getting yourself into and don’t end up with a million naira lawsuit like our darling Brymo.

The real question however that has me deaf with need to write is, as an artiste ‘ARE YOU MANAGEABLE?’ Or do you think the sun sets and rises on your behind?
I don’t mean to be harsh (actually I do) but it’s quite annoying to see good talent go to waste just because ego and ignorance got the better success, especially in the Nigerian music industry where mediocrity is celebrated.

Now asides the fact that we take what’s dished to us, the talentless few have blown because they want to hammer and don’t mind subjecting themselves to structure so long as they get what they want.

PAUSE! Take out the blindfolds and re-read what I just said. Ok good, so where were we?

Yes are you manageable? Your talent is not enough, can you follow the rules long enough to fulfill your own dreams? I did not say drop your style or what genre you want to stick to oh, I said drop the pride, attitude and get to work!
Do you think doctors go around screaming ‘I’m gifted oh, I’m gifted ehen’ and the money just appears. They write some of the hardest exams that exist, serve under extreme tutelage and rip animals apart in preparation for the operating table and here y’all are hollering!

The international stars you claim to be your inspiration are doing it the right way and those that can’t are indie artistes who are quite content with gigging and a small followership of family and friends. Now, if that’s your aim by all means, do you but if the reverse is the case then, ‘whatchu saying?’

Fine, I’ll be nice, it hurts to see the semi-successes and natural deaths of talents that have the potential to change the nigerian entertainment industry, listen, learn and stop acting like you’re DEAF to the truth!

Download Deaf by Eva here

http://notjustok.com/2014/01/24/eva-deaf/

Download Deaf (cover) by Boogie here

http://www.jaguda.com/2014/04/02/new-music-boogey-deaf-remix/

IDEA 2 PRODUCT – Understanding The creative process

Meet James Omokwe, a friend of mine and CEO of Studio 84. He’s a Film maker, editor, director of photography, actor, rapper etc, yes, yes he’s gifted, go figure.

He shot his first movie ‘The Awakening’ which was nominated for Best film 2013 AMVCA 2014 and Best vfx in a movie AMAA 2013.
After which he shot Tromper for Ebony Life/Live tv.

I’d say he’s got some experience under his belt having worked with stars like
Oc ukeje, tope tedela, kehinde bankole, femi brainard, Bryan okwara, Kc ejelonu *phew* and the list goes on.

Join James here every monday as he shares his experiences with us and gives us a few point on how to make our ideas, products.

Enjoy

Lesson 1:

Introduction: Belief: Do something #Idea2Product

Please comment so we can serve you better

FREEDOM … if we dont fight, who will?…

FREEDOM IS THEATRE PRODUCTION BY “THE SPEAKING FEET PROJECT” of Krump Studios, THE OFFICIAL PRODUCERS OF “GREASE THE NAIJA MIX”.

FREEDOM IS A TRUE NIGERIAN STORY UNSPOKEN, UNSEEN, UNHEARD, UNWRITTEN. IT SHOWS HOW AN INDIVIDUAL CAN BE AFFECTED BY SOCIETAL ISSUES, THE INSECURITIES IN A COUNTRY WHERE UNDERDEVELOPMENT AND UNEMPLOYMENT IS THE ORDER OF THE DAY. WE WONDER WHEN AND HOW SUCH ISSUES WILL BE RESOLVED AND EXCOMMUNICATED TOTALLY SO WE WILL NEVER HAVE TO REVISIT THEM.

YES!!! THE YOUTH SEEK THE FREEDOM TO FOLLOW THEIR DREAMS, THE FREEDOM TO LIVE LIFE WITHOUT FEAR, THE FREEDOM TO LOVE, THE FREEDOM TO GROW AND THE FREEDOM TO DREAM. WHAT MORE CAN WE DO THAN FIGHT FOR THE FREEDOM TO BELIEVE, THE FREEDOM TO HAVE FAITH AND THE FREEDOM TO HOPE.

THE FREEDOM TO ARE YOU A YOUTH AT HEART, A LOVER OF PERFORMING ARTS, AN ASPIRING PERFORMING ARTIST, AN EXPATRIATE? THEN THIS IS A MUST SEE FOR YOU.

BE FREE!!!

COMING SOON TO THE CITIES OF ABUJA AND LAGOS!!!

FOR SPONSORSHIP AND ADVERT BOOKINGS
CALL 07035686227 or 08185651796
Or ff @krump_studios or @isysdrain on twitter
#FREEDOM

K-Pop: The 3rd Edition

Saturday, 26th July was a day of great excitement amongst the dance community in Abuja. It was the 3rd edition of KPop, a dance competition organised by the Korean cultural centre.
Crews came in from across the nation to compete for a spot in the finals and one of those teams were Pacific, an all-star dance crew based in Abuja, led by Eno Ekpenyong.

Kpop is a competition aimed at promoting pop culture, dance and culture exchange amongst youths in Nigeria and Korea. I had never been to any of the competitions so I was quite excited to see it first hand.
It held at the Women’s Development Centre, Abuja and was hosted by Six Foot Plus.

The program began with the recital of the Nigerian and Korean national anthems, an opening speech by the Korean ambassador and introduction of the judges and members of the high table.

The competition itself has three stages, the online entry stage in which all competing crews are to send in a video of the kpop idol they would like to be. The best crews are then drafted to compete at the final round in Nigeria, the winners of the finale then represent Nigeria at the international level in Korea.
The stakes were high, the dancers were ready and the battle was on for the title of kpop champions.

To kick off the competition, all the selected videos of the Kpop idols were played and one by one, crews took to the stage to give the performance of a life time.
In the first category was the secondary school category, made up of about 6 crews. The contestants put on quite a show, with vibrant costumes and high energy dance.
The second category was the professional category and the excitement from the crowd meant the battle had begun.
Each crew took to the stage, amongst them crews from Jos, Kaduna, Abuja, Lagos and Benin.

While the judges were compiling results,
Kpop veterans iDez and Elevators entertained the crowd with exciting performances including a group number to Psy’s ‘Gagnum style’.

The winners of the Secondary category were GSS girls gwagwalada with GSS boys gwagwalada coming in 2nd.

The winners of Professional category
In first place -C.i squad, second Pacific and Flyhigh came in third.

*phew* What a battle! It was an experience worth having and loads of fun. Keep dancing, Keep k-popping! I can’t wait for the 4th edition, can you?

To You…

To You,

You are not a dangote, you are my pastor
You are not my competitor, you are my partner
You are not perfect, you are perfect for me
You are my husband, my brother, my friend
You are mine to have, to love and to hold

You are my completion, the balance I yearn
You are the seeker of my heart, the mate to my soul, the keeper of my love.
I can sense you praying for me as I am praying for you
Ours will be a love that people pray for and children sing about
From this love we will bring forth perfection born from a love only God can give

So I pray for you each day
Knowing that you are on your way
Forever yours,

Your Wife

The Adventures of Isys Drain: On A Zaria P (Day 2)

With the passing of the night came the dawning of a gold Zaria morning, cool, dusty and peaceful, save the music blasting from the opposite apartment. It had been a long night, my host Paula, had done everything possible to make me comfortable, God bless her soul.

So Day 1 of the ‘Limitless Mind’ dance workshop, organized by The Redeemed Dance Ministry and supported by The Krump Dance studio, was here at last, with Miracle set to teach basic contemporary. I wasn’t quite sure if I was excited or nervous but nothing could’ve prepared me for what I was about to experience.

In Zaria, Hip-Hop is the only recognised style of dance and growth in dance as well as the performing arts is crippled by the conservative nature of Northeners who frown upon overly social activities, especially dance. Many a dancer have given up on dance, cowering under societal pressure and silently longing for change.

After breakfast, we set out for the venue which is called ‘ChopHouse’, Miracle in instructor mode, me… Well trying to ignore my allergies *covers face* #buttyproblems
Bushes handled set-up, while Miracle prepped and I got into an interesting conversatiom with a guy called Arthur, a talented graphics designer and tee-maker (cool tees coming soon!)

The class started soon enough with stretches which is quite intense for the dancers as contemporary was foreign territory to them. A lot of them barely made it through the first set of stretches, poor things.

Miracle then went into the basics of dance, elements of dance and the art of choreography. I was completely transfixed as I watched him give life to the dreans of the eager young people before him. When he began the ‘white space’ exercise, time stopped and he pulled out the soul of every dancer, including mine. It was an experience that words could not express, a feeling of joy, pain, need swept over the room, reducing some of the dancers to tears, dance was birthed before my very eyes.

The class ended with choreography done to Miley Cyrus’ Wrecking Ball and To build a home by The Cinematic Orchestra.
20 dancers came in contact with their breakthrough, I make the 21st.

Lunch came and went, sleep followed suit, I was drained… Apiboi played host for my second night and my allergies kicked into overtime which wasn’t pretty at all. By the end of the day, I’d started to feel a tad ill, ah well… #buttyproblems
Bushes and Miracle left for their ‘crash site’ and I fell into a fitful sleep.

The day had served it’s purpose and my last night at Zaria had come. Day 2 of the workshop will be handled by Eno and he’ll be teaching Funk Jazz assisted by Justine. I won’t be there but y’all know I’ll have the gist…

#OnAZariaP

…Much love to bushes, sesan, paula, michael, gabby, apiboi, ty, meshach and the wonderful participants of the workshop…

Isys Drain

The Adventures of Isys Drain: On A Zaria P (Day 1)

So after experiencing the gruelling journey to Zaria from Kaduna, I must rename my adventure, bone #KDMovement this is On A Zaria P, the Road to Redeemed Dance Ministry’s first Dance workshop supported by Krump Studios.

#OnAZariaP

The day started off rather rough for me, having worked into the morning without recovering from Miracle’s hectic dance groove class the night before. Anyways, after a brief meeting with Mima and a deep breath, Miracle and I set out for the journey.

Mehn, I’ve gotta be delivered from road trips, I am not cut out for them at all. Funny thing is, I found the scenery quite fascinating for the part of the journey that I wasn’t busy groaning or feeling nauseous. Thankfully God blessed me with sleep, you know, the kind that distracts you from pain.

Sha, three hours and a couple of snores later, we got to the park and had to get a bus ( that was more of a human sandwich can) to some place called Samaru. Mehn, the squishing in that bus wasn’t funny, I jumped out like cat woman the moment we got to our stop.

Bushes ( my newest ‘baby’) was waiting for us at the stop and led us into the gates of ABU Zaria, the alma mater of some of the best people I’ve been blessed to have in my life, Jemima Angulu being one of them.
So far the school is… Well… ‘Schooly’ and conservative at that. It was quite interesting to be in a school environment again, I should feel old right? Well I don’t *shrugs*

I’m making acquaintances at the moment, the exco’s Gabby, Ruth, Blessing and Sesan are quite welcoming. Paula is amazing too, looks like this will be fun…
#OnAZariaP #KDMovement

Local Terrorists At A Global Summit

Hmm
Tweet rants are what birthed this post read carefully Nigerians and Pray for your country!

So lemme explain this in plain english.
Boko haram was created by northern politicians that realized that come 2015, the control of Nigeria’s oil rigs will be handed over to the Niger Delta region and their source of power will be lost. With GEJ in power he will ensure the right thing be done once he is re-elected but our greedy northern politicians don’t want that to happen. How else will they control the nation’s economy?

So boko haram was birthed. Rich northern politicians hired ignorant northern youths to do their dirty work by cajoling them into fighting a sharia war that does not exist to distract nigerians from the truth and paint GEJ bad so he will not be re-elected.
Young northerners are fighting a false war, dying as martyrs with a promise of heavenly rewards from hell-goers who claim to be god.

Poor GEJ’s inability to handle his public speeches and react to negative situations has aided the painting of his face black.
But he knows what’s happening and has refused to fight this battle, wise but not exactly the naija way of doing things (I mean, obasanjo would’ve leveled another village in warning na!)
Anyways, the northern pot-bellied politicians I was talking about earlier, don’t care about innocent killings, they’re on a mission ‘Keep our oil rigs and kick out GEJ before nigerians catch on’.

But boko-bombing isn’t all oh! The fake boko-kidnappings nko? The girls don’t have parents abi why are politicians wives leading protests on behalf of supposed ‘mourning mothers’?

GEJ may seem stupid to the nation and sometimes he can be (no offense Sir *bows low*) but he didn’t put the World Economic Summit together for nothing.
You see, local rats and trained guard dogs can’t reside in the same place and obviously the dirty politicians trying to ruin his campaign won’t stop, so he called in America – the terrorist hunters. Haven’t you noticed how boko-bombing has turned into peaceful #BringBackOurGirls Protests?
How dare local uneducated youths fight the terrorists that just buried Iraq?
They no fit.

Ah GEJ is smart. America wants to control our oil, so they’ll gladly offer security and turn it into a global war. Japan/China own our trade agreements so they are here to make sure America doesn’t overstep it’s boundary while GEJ markets our economy which is apparently more investment friendly than SA, see sense. GEJ isn’t good with public appearances but he’s a strategist.
With America bullying boko, he’ll be re-elected but here’s the catch America controls the oil that is already in Niger-Delta so it’s a win-win, boko haram dies a natural death and niger delta gets what it deserves with supervision by the Terrorist hunters.

Once the battle for oil no is longer an national issue, all the politicians will just calm down. The power don miss for yankee shores be that na (my pidgin sucks I know)

Now this is what will save GEJ’s image for the rest of his life, with oil out the way he should push for confederalism! Nigerians will never see beyond their religious and tribal differences if they are not forced to split from Federalism. There will be no more national cake, instead it’ll be ‘go and develop your state’ instead. If you are culturally biased, move back to your state oh! It’s not by force!
Then the competition will start, ‘my state must be better than yours’, fortunately lagos will be light years ahead of everyone else, they never had oil so they took a leaf from Dubai’s book and merged tourism with their love for partying!

In the blink of an eye Nigeria will be re-aligned with it’s God’s given destiny without a bloody revolution.
God loves Nigeria that’s why we haven’t ended up in War! I hope GEJ doesn’t mess up but something tells me this is has been his plan from the onset, so I will pray for him and forgive his wife for trying to destroy the foundations of my house with the bombshells she throws from Aso rock, so help me God!

Yes I said it… #Ntorr

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From my Heart to Yours

To You,
These days I can’t stop thinking about you, where you could be, what you are doing and if you are looking for me.
I don’t know if I’ve met you yet or if that day is close by but I do know that I’m waiting for you. I won’t pass time with shadows of you or date until you show up, I’ll just keep my heart open and pray for you till you find me.

I know you will love me as you love God, I know you seek me in Him and know Him as He lives in me. I know you are smart and creative and love art in all it’s forms. Together we’ll smile over the masterpiece we shall create.

I imagine the endless walks we’ll have, hand in hand talking about anything and everything. I’ll be safe with you and you with me. Ours will be a love worth fighting for, worth writing about, worth living.
We’ll speak the same language and share the same thoughts, we’ll be one , I your rib, you my heart.

You, me, we, us…

Till you find me though, here I am, head on my pillow, heart hidden with my Father, writing letters about our love and patiently waiting for you.

From Me

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Dear Diary – Ifeoluwa

I accept the love of God that has been available to me before my inception
That saved me before my acknowledgment of sin,
That speaks for me beyond my being.

I was born into love in an imperfect world
And this love inspired my name,
Ifeoluwa which is the love of God.
The love that birthed me however didn’t last
It fell apart and broke my heart
Leaving me searching for what I thought love was
Confusion set in as various shadows of the real thing tore me apart so bad
That I yearned for love yet had no idea how to receive it.

I could not find the love that was waiting patiently for me till it arrested me
Captured me and held tight
Not letting me go even though I struggled to escape it,
It was the love of my father,
He wept with me, He wept for me but amidst this He comforted me
Telling me He loved me

I heard Him but didn’t believe Him
I couldn’t identify what I felt,
I had been bruised into believing love was pain
I had been battered into equating love with hate
What was this He felt for me?
This life He gave to give me life, a light to save me from the dark
It was love…

I fought it so hard but couldn’t win against the power that suppressed me
I stopped long enough to look again and I saw it
It was love, the love of my Father, the love of God.
Words can’t describe it yet I try to share this feeling that has engulfed me with peace, hope, joy…
I fly wingless and I soar,
I walk on water knowing I’m safe

What I knew as love was not what He felt for me,
What He felt for me was the Love that He is,
A love He had for me before I knew,
I get it now and I receive the Love of God
After all, it is for Him I was named,
His first born, Ifeoluwa

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Dear Diary

Dear Diary,
Service today was awesome! It was one of thanksgiving that ushered us into the month of April and the realization of who I am in Christ hit me with a renewed purpose.

Everybody hits rock bottom (or different versions of it) now and again. You know that time when all you see is a brick wall between you and the next best thing. That period of frustration, laced with depression and branded despair.

Oh yes, I know the feeling a little too well and it has never been pretty.
Every time I hit this point, I spiral down into an abyss that leaves me helpless, worthless and ashamed. My ability to create dims until it becomes a shadow of what I am capable of, my worries become my nightmares and fear keeps me asleep with eyes wide shut, forcing me never see beyond of the circumstance I’m in.
Even when I’ve reached a point where I know I have to get up and out, I fight so hard to fly with wings that aren’t mine to direct.
Sad, is what it is… Sad

But when I have fallen from the flesh that fights to suffocate me into the Spirit that yearns to save me, I encounter a spiritual revival that sets me straight and this is what has happened to me today.
I rededicated myself to the Source, God Himself and the rivers of water flowed through me, unlocking the doors of limitations, setting me free. I went from being unable to do a thing to being hyper-creative. The inspiration is from God, the joy is of God and my life is for God.
And with this revolution came a revelation of thanksgiving.

I am a first generation Christian and I have faced the troubles of coming from a Christ-less (Muslim) home alone with no one to help me but God, yet here I am. The testimony following this encounter was my baby brother revealing to me how he too had eaten of the bread and drunk of the blood. Indeed my brother is saved too and I couldn’t be happier.
In addition, doors of opportunity have opened up and I know that I am a changed person, wrapped in favor and dipped in grace.

The Word I leave for you is…
Seek ye first the Kingdom of God and it’s righteousness and all

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The Adventures of Isys Drain: Football Saturday

Guys take football way too seriously jor, if there was a dollar paid to fans for every match won by their teams, guys would be rich. Today at Jabi lake, the Krump Studios crew split up into two teams for their first in-house football match.

It Was Epic!

On team A was Miracle, Justin , Victor, Tabitha and the Queen Krump herself Mima while team B had Frankie, Princess, Uche, Eno and Praise our favorite salsero. The match started with friendly comradery until the goals started dropping. The game got tougher and soon enough both teams had two goals a piece. The attack line from Team B definitely put a lot of pressure on Team A but surprisingly Tabitha (Team A’s keeper) stepped up nicely. Team B’s effortless team work won them the game fair and square with 3 goals to 2.

I had fun screaming. Hold up I can see the looks y’all are getting, let me bring it to your notice ehn, I’m not cut out for playing football. Why would I place myself in the midst of raging boys trying to kick a ball? I could get hurt! Heck no, my skills are for the side-lines only 😉 . Anyhu moving on, it was an awesome day. The winners won movie night together sponsored by the losing team, the way forward if you ask me.

I managed to famz in one picture and collect a few for this post enjoy and see you at the next match!

P.s. For dance and fitness services check out Krump Studios, 31, Alex Ekweme street, Jabi or call 08185651796

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The Adventures of Isys Drain : Friday’s Intervention

I’ve been looking forward to this weekend and now that’s it’s here, it’s turning out to be my best weekend this month.

After an extremely productive week, the tension and pressure I was under had started to take it’s toll. I knew I was in need of an intervention and music by a genius was the definitely the way to go.
Now when I say genius I can only mean one person and that is Atta Lenell (I honestly can’t get over the visit *gushes*). We caught up on all the gist we’d missed out on (which was quite a lot) since we hadn’t seen each other in almost a year.

After that, Atta started to paint the musical story of our time apart with strings, chords and other things.
My face lit up as every new transformation opened me up to a different side of every voice I heard, causing me to see good in myself as well as the awesomeness being played. Atta had indeed been busy giving life to songs by John Oga, Kenny and Jessica Bongus Ikuwe.

The mood had been set, I was floating on air and just when I thought things couldn’t get any better, Atta’s impressive writing shook hands with his guitar and the experience went ‘deep’. Nothing gets me more than music with substance and a dash of uniqueness. The entire experience was surreal, words can’t truly do justice to the impact it had on me.

I obviously haven’t gotten over the awesomeness but I can’t be blamed *blush*. Atta is the future of good music in this country and no, afro-pop doesn’t fall into that category for me.

I drifted all the way home after that and slept like a baby. I’m blessed to be surrounded by talented people and Atta Lenell is definitely one of them.

Next stop football with @Krumpstudios

P.S. Follow Atta @Attalenell on twitter and check out his website attalenell.com

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Corporate Ties: The Night Cap

I shouldn’t be here! I shouldn’t be here! I should turn around and leave before she notices my car in the drive way. I’d been telling myself this for about 20mins as I sat parked in front of Lana’s house.
I wasn’t going to show up, I’d gone to get a drink and found myself heading to her house.
I kept telling myself it was because Teju had to work this weekend and I was bored but I knew I just wanted to see her again. I had been fine, till she’d shown up unannounced at the office.
‘Brrring brrring’
It was Lana
‘Hi’
‘Hi’
‘I suspect you’re the one parked in my driveway, the house girl’s been watching you and just asked me if she should call our security’
‘I’m sorry’
‘Well wait there, I’ll be down in a second’ she said and hung up.
So much for escaping, I thought. ‘I might as well strap myself in for the ride’ I said to myself as Lana made her way to the car in a jumpsuit that left little to the imagination.

‘Hey stranger’ she said as she got into the passengers seat.
‘So we’re not staying here’ she continued ‘we’re going to the town house in VGC, seems more appropriate’.
I started the car and listened as she gave me directions.

*** *** ***
This isn’t a house, it’s a mansion ‘ I said as we drove in. I got out the car and stared at the gigantic building in front of me.
‘I’m happy you like it’ she said grabbing my hand
‘Come on let’s go in’
I couldn’t help thinking of what could be done with all that space as she pulled me in to the living room.
It was the size of a football field! The walls were white and immaculate interrupted by a painting or portrait. The furniture smelt new and the rugs were plush and black. To the left was what seemed liked a mini-cinema complete with elevated seating and what was probably the biggest tv I’d ever seen…

‘Ok so sit and explain to me why have you been avoiding me? She said.

‘I haven’t been avoiding you’ I said trying to sound convincing as I looked hurriedly away. What was I supposed to say? I have a girlfriend who’d kill me if she’d found out, a boss who’d fire me and I can’t trust myself when I’m around you? Nah, I thought shaking my head slightly, lying was easier.
‘Anyways, I didn’t think I’d see you again?’ I went on.
‘I didn’t think I’d see you after that night either, which was quite a night, if I might add’, she had this grin on her face that had me smiling. I had to admit, it had been one hell of a night and if things were different… Calm down I thought to myself, this isn’t the time to ponder on the ‘if’s ‘ and ‘maybes’ of that night.

Lana didn’t seem to mind my silence as she seemed to be busy with thoughts of her own.
‘Well, this is awkward’ she said, ‘let me show you around and maybe we could find something to watch afterwards’ she continued as she pulled me out of the seat.

We walked through the house, hand-in-hand as she talked about the house, her family and the artwork. She was like a child talking about her favorite toy. Her eyes sparkled in the light and her ponytail swayed, lightly brushing her back, as she turned her head this way and that. We went up a flight of stairs, ‘these are made of mahogany from india’ she was saying as I eyed the banisters which had intricate patterns carved into them. We made our way across the landing in a room which held an indoor pool with a beautiful view overlooking the acres and acres of greenery that made up this vast piece of property. The pool itself was empty, but it glistened as the rays of sunlight hit it giving it a somewhat ethereal look as the light bounced off the walls.

We moved from room to room till finally we came to what looked like the master bedroom. I felt like an intruder as I stood at the door, gaping at the luxury suite before me. I wonder how much money these people really have, I thought as allowed Lana pull me in.
I sat on the bed, trying to take it all in when Lana kissed me. She’d caught me completely off-guard with it and I braced myself in time for the next one. Her lips tasted sweet and she smelled of candy floss. Her arms circled my neck, tugging gently on the tufts of my hair. I was falling, plummeting actually, into her kiss when I remembered Teju and Mr Grant and sat up gently pushing Lana away.

‘This isn’t right’ I finally said, ‘your dad is my boss and I have a girlfriend that you happen to have met’.
I got up and walked to the window, not trusting myself to look back at Lana’s now slightly swollen lips or steamy eyes. If only she wasn’t so beautiful, I thought to myself for the umpteenth time.
Just then, l heard a thud. I turned to see Lana standing, a surprised look on her face. The sound came again, only this time I could’ve sworn I’d heard laughter.
Lana walked towards the sound, which seemed to be coming from the adjourning bathroom.

I moved past her, determined to shield her from whatever it was, when the door opened abruptly.
There before me was Teju, hair wet, naked save the towel wrapped loosely around her waist and Mr Grant, in a white terry robe, holding her to his chest.

The Adventures of Isys Drain: My First Hip-Hop Class

Now I know what you’re thinking… Me… Hip-hop… How?
Well believe it or not I had my first hip-hop class today. Krump studios hosted it’s first workshop for the year with Carl James of Mobile Dance Academy (MDA) and Ibrahim Suleiman (Captain Quest) of Soul Quest and I was privileged to be a part of it.

It kicked off with Latin, which for me (being a social salsa dancer and all) was brutal! My body was doing the exact opposite of what my head was saying, which isn’t difficult when you’re moving your hips, waist, feet and arms at the same time. Anyways, we did a crash basic class in Salsa, Samba and Paso Doble, with Carl cutting us no slack at all. It was fun, tiring and frustrating. I mean Carl was moving his hips better than mine for pete’s sake! Worse, I’m not sure I still know where my hips are after that class!

After two and half hours of swaying hips and stomping feet, we moved on to hip-hop which was probably the most enlightening experience for me, not just because I got to sit down through the whole thing,listen and observe, but also because I’d never met a professional hip-hop dancer who is as refined (for lack of a better word) as ‘Captain Quest’.
He took us through Musicality 101. He explained the essence of accounting for every sound one chooses to emphasize in any given piece of music, the need to understand your body, the music and the message essentially passed across to give a meaningful performance.

The greatest lesson I did learn today however was about loyalty. As creative people, we yearn for freedom to express without restriction. We are self-acclaimed geniuses and sometimes unwilling followers. In an industry that barely exists, thriving as a dancer is tough and money dictates to many, one must marry passion with structure and submit to an authority that will and can speak for you.

That said, y’all know I do not have a hiphop bone in my body. So this class was perfect! Of course I did well, I mean I just gave you full gist na and I didn’t have to pop, lock or do a windmill! Anyways it was a great way to spend my sunday and another opportunity to be around talented people!

For more on dance classes, training and fitness rush down contact
Krump Studios @ 31, Alex Ekweme street, Jabi or Call 08185651796

Corporate Ties: The Visit

‘You lying son of a bitch’ Teju screamed as she threw a pot my way.
I barely missed it but was rewarded with the huge clang it made as it hit the wall behind me. ‘I’ll kill you’ she yelled, I moved towards her and the knife I hadn’t seen her hold went into my stomach, I watched the blood spill as…

‘Shit!’ I hissed as I jolted back to reality. Another late night at work and I’d nodded off in the staff lounge. I hadn’t recovered from the shock of seeing Lana again or the fear of Teju and my boss finding out about us. It didn’t help that Lana had slipped her number to me while Teju had made a quick trip to ladies room.
I was torn between calling her and burning the damn card with her number on it.
I grabbed a mug and hurriedly made myself a cup of coffee. I had a ton of work waiting for me and an impossible deadline to meet,dwelling on my woman trouble wouldn’t exactly get the work done, I thought to myself as walked back to my desk.

*** *** *** *** ***

I heard her before I saw her, her soft accented voice as she came down the hall. Lana was here, at work, after hours, phone held to her ear, eyes bright and looking as stunning as ever. She threw me a glance and walked into her father’s office.
My heart did a couple of somersaults despite my attempts to ignore the fact that she was here.
If only she wasn’t so beautiful… And smart… And articulate… And…
‘Yes father, now please let’s leave, it’s bad enough that I had to pick you up this late…’ She said as walked out of Mr Grant’s office.
‘Well darling, how else would I get home?’
They both laughed as they made their way to the elevator.

‘ Good night Feyi, I see you intend to slave away for a while longer’ came Mr Grant’s voice as he stepped into the lift.

‘ Uh yes goodnight sir’ I said not daring to look up.

I stared hard at my laptop waiting patiently for the elevator door to close. I didn’t realize I’d been holding my breath till I heard the bell signifying the lift was heading down.
She hadn’t said a word to me. Perhaps, she hated me for not calling. After all it has been a week since the dinner but I was right not to, I mean, I’m not equipped for an affair? Doesn’t help that she’s the boss’s daughter, my job’d be on the line, and then there’s Teju…

‘Hi’
I jumped out of my seat. There Lana was standing in front of me.
‘Calm down, it’s just me’ she said
‘I came back up to get daddy’s jacket’ she said moving closer to my table.
‘Also, why haven’t you called me yet? I don’t bite you know’ she said as she walked into her father’s office. I wasn’t sure whether to follow or stay put but she was out before I made up my mind.
‘ So daddy’s out of town this weekend, business I suspect’ she said as she jotted on my notepad.
‘Come over, let’s talk, don’t see why we can’t be civil towards each other hon’ she winked
‘ Yes, yes, you’re right I’m sorry’ I muttered.
‘ He speaks at last’
‘I’m sorry, I was a bit… Well I wasn’t expecting to see you here’ I blurted.
‘My father does work here you know, besides if you weren’t so busy avoiding me, you would’ve known’ she said rolling her beautiful eyes at me.
‘ Anyways, be a sport, come keep me company on saturday, let’s at least talk’ she smiled sweetly.
‘Besides you make a mean conversation when you’re not tongue-tied and playing the shy card’ she said as she turned and walked away, leaving me to stare at the address she’d given me.

The Day He Said No

It was that green bottle’s fault!
I was fine with my indomie, egg and water till I spotted it, cold and temptingly green.
I turned away, not wanting to succumb to its call but the drasted bottle stayed within sight, winking at me in a million tiny bubbles…

I reached for water but the bottle came to me instead. I had to have it, my meal would not be the same without it, so I did what was only right that I do…
I asked if I could have it.
Little did I know that the image of that green bottle had been his motivation for the day, the one thing he was looking forward too, so of course he said no!

http://images-01.delcampe-static.net/img_large/auction/000/204/691/764_001.jpg?v=4

Not once, not twice but three times did he say that awfully disappointing word that shattered my dreams of a fully sumptuous meal.
NO!
A word he never said to me…
It was that green bottle’s fault, that drasted bottle winking at me in a million bubbles…

Corporate Ties: The Dinner

I held both ties up in front of the mirror. Blue or Purple? *sigh* what was one supposed to wear to dinner with the boss anyway?
I eyed the outfit I’d picked out and shook my head.
Mr Grant definitely was bourgie folk, he’d made reservations at Chateau de Rouge and I’d all but talked Teju out of splurging on a new dress, now I wish I’d gotten myself a new outfit too.
Settling for the purple tie, I jumped out of my clothes and into the shower, Buble’s soft voice playing from the room…

**** **** **** ****
Teju looked stunning in the little black number she’d chosen for the night making me feel a lot more confident as walked up to our table.
I soon spotted Mr Grant, hair slicked back in a pony tail as he easily wore a black Armani suit with a white shirt loosely opened at the neck. Could the man be anymore intimidating? He smiled and waved us casually into our seats.

‘Good evening Sir, this is a lovely place’ I said taking his outstretched hand.
‘Oh it’s nothing, I’ve been coming here since it opened’ he said laughing as I helped Teju into her seat.
‘This is my girlfriend Teju’ I said,
They shook hands and I braced myself for the onslaught of an evening with boss.

Things went pleasantly, we had wine and shrimps and talked about everything from the weather to the match against Chelsea. Well, Mr Grant and Teju did most of the talking, I just nodded and kept an eye on my watch.
I heard her before I saw her and my heart jumped into my mouth as I literally choked on my drink.
‘Ah finally, honey’ Mr Grant said as he stood to kiss her on the cheek. Lana kissed him back and apologized for being late ‘Bloody island traffic’ she said shaking her head. She caught my eye and smiled,
‘Daddy introduce us won’t you’ she said sitting beside Mr Grant.
‘Oh yes my manners, Lana meet Feyi from the office and Teju his beautiful and rather interesting girlfriend’ he said winking at Teju who, I couldn’t believe, was giggling like a teenager.

This was going to be one long dinner, I groaned inwardly and prayed for a miracle

Corporate Ties: The Meeting

It had been two weeks since Alex’s party and even though I was drowning in work, I couldn’t seem to get her out of my head. Lana…
She was a rare blend of everything my dream woman was meant to be, classy, smart and a natural beauty. *Sigh*
Teju was better suited as a buddy when placed in comparism with Lana. It wasn’t fair to do that, she’d been my friend for two years and girlfriend for six months and to be honest, she was the closest I’d come to a serious relationship in a long time but I’d never been able to shake the feeling that we were friends with benefits, even after I had finally asked her out over christmas.

I should feel guilty, I thought to myself, I’d spent the night with a stranger and there my girlfriend was trusting me to be the loyal boyfriend while she was away. I’d never cheated on her and though it wasn’t a good enough excuse, Lana was a taste of something different. Besides Teju wasn’t going to find out anyway, what she didn’t know wouldn’t hurt her and I never got Lana’s number so chances of seeing her again were slim.
I snapped out of my reverie as Alex dumped a pile of documents in front of me.

‘Sorry bruv, new department head just got in and asked for you to sort this out, plus meeting at his office is in…’ He checked his watch, ‘ 5mins, see you in a bit’.

I groaned, hibernated my laptop and walked over to the boss’s office. Work had resumed with a couple of surprises, the company had hired a team of managers from Alias Clark to replace all managerial staff which meant we all had new bosses. I’d heard about the new guy in our department, smart fella in his mid-forties with a rather intimidating resume. Hadn’t gotten to meet him though, so the timing was perfect.

A small crowd had formed in front of his office, I planted myself on a table at the back of the crowd just out of sight as his door opened.
‘Good day, I’m Bode Grant’ came a loud, nasal voice. He was definitely not what I was expecting. At about 6 feet, he towered over the crowd, his lips thin, nose pinched with beady dark eyes and dreadlocks tied back in a pony tail. His body looked like it was about to pop out of his suit as his muscles bulged dangerously. Jesus! This guy could pass for a bouncer at a night club, except perhaps for the british accent.

I’d barely gotten over the sight of the man, when I got nudged in the side.
‘I asked for your name, you don’t seem to be here’ he said looking pointedly at me.
‘Sorry, I’m Feyi, Feyi Shittu’ I said standing to my feet.
Everyone else introduced themselves as I watched the clock tick. The last name was said and Mr Grant went into a speech of how he intended to change things and improve the quality of work churned out by the department. A few minutes later we were done and he summoned me into his office.

‘Feyi, I’m told by your former head of department that you are being considered for a promotion’.

My jaw dropped as I stood opposite him.

‘By the look on your face I am guessing you weren’t told’.

I nodded for lack of a better response.

‘Well, I’d like to take you out this evening and get to know you a bit better before putting my name on your reference’, ‘bring a date, I’ll mail you the details’.

‘Uh thanks… Uh Sir’ I said barely getting the words out. I was still in shock, I had been convinced that Mr Soji had hated me. I was the only one who worked extra hours, got sent on business trips and external meetings that no one ever wanted to go to, not to mention being on the receiving end of his endless tantrums, yet all this time he’d been pushing for my promotion.

I walked back to my table and a smile crept to my face. Dinner with the new boss, not bad. I picked up my phone and dialed Teju.

Corporate Ties : The Hook-up

This was definitely what I needed, I thought to myself as four bikini clad girls jumped into Alex’s indoor pool. I smiled as I turned back to the bar, nodding to the bartender for a refill.
Work had become a nightmare, my relationship a bore and my friends… Well I didn’t exactly have time for them except Alex of course…

It had been a huge relief when management announced the office having to close down for a week for security installments or whatever. It was my first break in five months and Alex had thrown a party to celebrate.
And celebrate I shall, I thought to myself as I grabbed my glass and made my way through the crowd in search of good conversation.

*** *** *** ***

I must’ve been out for two hours because it had grown darker outside and the party was in full swing. I struggled to sit up, wondering how I had managed to sleep over all the noise when I saw her sitting opposite me. She had long dark legs that went up into an emerald green dress . Her hair was held up at the back of her head and she wore drop earrings that brushed her shoulders. I was surprised yet pleased to see the lack of make-up as I studied her face, her lips full, slowly stretching into a smile, her beauty striking and natural. It took five whole seconds for me to realize that she had been talking to me,
‘Didn’t anyone ever tell you it’s rude to stare and drool’, she passed me a paper towel and my tongue came unhinged in time for me to say thank you.
‘I’m Lana and my feet are killing me’ she said as she leaned forward to unstrap her ankle length boots. Her breasts pressed against her knees threatening to pop out of her strapless dress.
‘What do you do? If you talk that is?’ She asked.
She waited patiently for me to open my mouth again and I eventually obliged, sputtering to life.

We talked, flirted, drank. It was easy, interesting and undemanding. Her accent gave her a refined air which suited her perfectly. She had this bubbly laughter and her nose wrinkled every time she took a sip from her glass. It was cute.
As the night drew on, we moved to a cozy corner in the living room and huddled up on the couch talking, sharing a kiss and a shot, oblivious to everything around us.
Alex walked up to us, a lady on each arm and after kissing them both, threw me a key, winked and left. Lana took the key and pulled me up. We stumbled down the hall way in search of the door to which the key belonged. Three tries and a make-out session later, we found it and fell into the room giggling like teenagers.

We rolled on the plush carpet and she started unbuttoning my shirt. I kicked the door shut lazily and reached for the zip at the back of her dress, kissing her neck lightly as I took in her perfume.

She, I , we… My name was the last thing I heard as I gave into the night…

*** *** *** ***
I waded in the water as the clouds rained dark chocolate from the sky. It formed a puddle that rose into the shape of a woman. She walked towards me with her arms outstretched. I held her in a tight embrace and she whispered in my ear. It was a shrill sound, I tried to make out what she was saying when…
‘Brrrring, brrrrring’ I groaned and rolled over
‘Brrrrring, brrrrring’.
Damn it! My alarm! I reached for my trousers and yanked out my phone. With one eye closed, I turned off the alarm. I rolled on to my back, then sat up.
‘Lana?’ I said getting up to check the bed.
‘Lana?’ I opened the bathroom door, she wasn’t there.

I sat on the bed and tugged at the pillow.
A sheet of paper fell to the floor, it was a note.
‘Last night was fun, Love Lana’
I turned it over hoping to find a number or something but that was it.
I sighed, got under the sheets and went back to bed.

The Bucket List

Bucket List

Bucket List

The Bucket List is an awesome movie if you’ve never seen, I obviously have and I thought I’d watch it again this morning…

This is what happens when your neighbors refuse to get a divorce and resume fights at 3am in the morning (in case you were wondering)

Anyways, after watching the movie again (and blubbering like a two year old) I asked myself what would be on my Bucket List.

Before I go on to answer that, I must tell you how petrified I am of death. I know it’s unavoidable and if you lead a good life you’ll go to heaven and all but that doesn’t change the fact that death is scary as hell… (No pun intended)
I mean how does the soul leave the body? Is it painful? ( I hear even voldermort had to experience some human feeling when he split his soul into those horcruxes *shudders*). Do you wake up in the grave or roam the earth till judgment day or just haunt some old house till infinity *shudders*

Bottom line, I hate death but since I can’t avoid it I’ve decided to try my hand at writing my own bucket list (which is almost as scary)

*takes deep breath*

The Bucket List of Isys Drain

Below reads the list of things I’d love to do before I die *drum roll please*

1. Buy all the Harry Potter books to add to my library

2. Be known for being the best at every single thing that I’m a part of

3. Fall in love (for real…, you know the never ending kind)

4. Marry a multiracial husband, have curly haired babies and adopt a mexican/chinese kid( shouldn’t these be seperate?)

5. Travel the world in 80days and write about it… (What? Childhood fantasies are allowed na)

6. Own a school of arts before I’m 50

7. Build a local library and bookstore in every community I’ve lived in

8. Start a book club

9. Learn how to play the piano before I’m 50

10. Learn how to speak hausa and italian at some point in my life ( I mean it’s taking forever, mschew)

11. Be part of a live audience of So You Think You Can Dance! (And meet Nigel while at it!)

12. Have latin ballroom and contemporary certifications before I’m 35 ( I mean, someone’s gotta teach the kids 😉 )

13. Help export Nigerian Art and Culture (it’s about time dontchu think)

14. Own a recreational centre if I can…

15. Sponsor education for 1 child every year for 10years…

16. Go treasure hunting…

17. Definitely try bunjy jumping (not in nigeria oh!

18. See cirque de solie live ( and maybe bring it to nigeria *hmm*)

19. Leave a comprehensive will for my children

20. Collect every disney cartoon that exists before I start having kids

21. Own a tour bus mehn!

22. Be genuinely surprised

23. Oh yeah and try swimming with dolphins (at sea world oh, as shark dey real sea so…)

24. Write a best selling novel, then make a movie adaptation

25. Meet Darren Criss

26. And of course, own my very own empire (legacy tinz)

Hmm… the list may be modified at some point in time, but these are the things I hope to do before I die…

*sigh* it actually wasn’t so bad writing it. Have you ever written a bucket list? Have you seen the movie? You should do both and share if you like 😉

Leiber Lover

Urgh! It took me 16 days to respond to this, shame on moi. Let’s see, where am I supposed to start? *eyes deolu bubble’s list of instructions and scratches head*

Though I must say, who’d’ve thought my blog’d be nominated for anything? Didn’t think anyone noticed its existence or wait was Deolu Bubble trying to psyche me up so he could set p? Hmm…

It might be genuine love sweety but Wana beat u to it, *adjusts bra* but I digress….

This Leiber definition sef, *copy and paste from Deolu Bubbles blog*, who’s that complaining? Deolu dubbed too na, I must follow the leader God no go vex abeg, no be exam :p

So, the Leiber award apparently is an award given to up and coming bloggers with under 200 wordpress followers, the leibster award originated in Germany and Leibster means ‘dearest or beloved’ and leibe is ‘love’.

Hian sounds like a weird word made up by Justin Beiber fanatics singing ‘ then I saw his face, now I’m a be-lieber!’ *snorts* sorry guys just couldn’t help myself *chuckles*

The Rules *yawns*

1.Thank the person who nominated you
2. List 11 random facts about yourself. Answer the questions they have asked you
3. Nominate 11 other people
4. Ask the nominees 11 questions
5. Last and thankfully the least, let them know you have nominated them.

Choi I tire, ehen oya lets do this…

Thank you ‘Deolu Bubble for nominating my blog out of obscurity, God go make you bigger and deliver you from your sexcapades that keeps us running to read all your R-rated posts! Plenny of love (plus some kiss assing of course). Not sure if anyone else nominated me but eh, if anyone did I extend the same love to you (no homo ladies). Ah ha moving on…

11 random facts about me, hmm how do I do this without boring you guys to death
1.I’m totally awesome
2.I’m a rebel
3. Football bores me to pieces (sorry guys)
4. Hi I’m Isys and I’m a recovering twitter addict and an unapologetic bb addict
5. I’ve got a hot butt for the guys who were wondering 😉
6. I’m an artist but who isn’t these days?
7. I secretly wish Abacha would come back just to shoot GEJ while Obasanjo has a field day burning down all the Boko haram settlements
8. I am a bonafide foodist!
9. Yes and despite my obvious weirdness I’m a Christian, go figure
10. I’ve got a nice big afro GO BLACK POWER! GO AFRO –CENTRIC ME!
11. Did I mention how I awesome I was?* Pouts at mirror*

Are y’all still here? Ok good so now to answer Deolu’s questions which I’ve been dreading for a fortnight, Hian!

How old were you when you got your cherry popped?

12 , didn’t exactly have the chance to say no but yeah shit happens…

Skydiving or Bungee Jumping?

Well both freak me out like no mans business but I’d say sky diving,it might be cool to fly like a bird in another life

Jollof rice or fried rice?

Is that even a question? Fried rice na

Your highest point in life till date

Not sure really, probably the day I got saved #JesusTinz

Linda ikeji or Toolz?

Deolu, seriously? I resemble man, hian! Although that Toolz babe ehn …

Feyikogbon or gboromiro?

Uh… what is that?

Your most expensive possession

My property I guess *starts counting*

The sexiest asset on your body

Well that’s pretty obvious, even Timaya had to do a track just for me *shakes bum in the mirror* 😉

Get even or forgiveness?

Forgiveness, Why would I let someone live rent free in my mind when I’ve more important stuff to focus on, Why?

Nkem Owoh or Mr. Ibu?

I dunno either, I’m afraid.

*phew* and that is over, halleluyah *wipes brow*

Ok so my nominees are, drum roll pls!
@oluwawanababa @sirkastiq @vixenpixie @haemlet_ @tomboxe @ms_einsteinette @cumical @jeremytargert @theGeekyMidget. @deolububbles and zubair

Pls note: I expect a bottle of malt plus a hand written thank you note for this nomination eh hen! Something for something, na Naija we dey.
Hmm so my questions hehe *rubs palms together*

1.What would you do if you found a bag full money laying idle on the road side?
2. If you were asked why you were on earth what would you say?
3. Would you come back as a Nigerian if given a second chance at life?
4. Are you bored yet?
5. What’s your biggest turn on? (sexual)
6. Fruits or vegetables?
7. How long can you go without sex? (be honest boys)
8. Disney or Marvel?
9. Beauty or brains?
10. No seriously aren’t you bored yet?
11. Would you date/marry a chic/dude whose got a kid?

And finally, for real this time, it’s over. What torture Deolu has subjected me to, I mean I love you partially and all but even the Grammy’s doesn’t require all this grammar for nominee selection choi!
And with that I shall quit my whining and let you all get back to living a nice and normal life, safe y’all wana’s moi-moi is calling my name!
*rushes to playbookutunu next door*

Skin and Bones

Who are you? What are you?
Better yet is there a you behind those big brown eyes constantly shining like a deer in headlights with innocence written in the lies across your face?
A tormented soul darker than the dredges deep down under, suppressing the light yet killing the good that fights to rescue the nothingness that you are but can’t see.

A mask can only cover your face, it will not hide your identity, expressed through every manipulative action carefully calculated to draw the pity from which you derive your ‘victim’ status. Tiny and helpless you, the biggest con the big-hearted have ever met, draining them of the love they want to share and returning it with frustration, pain and rage just to get a kick.

You know not who you are yet you feel you know what you want, completely oblivious to what you need. Can’t you see that you’ve got all that you want? No you can’t, because you never really did want it, it just makes you feel better having it just in case what you actually want doesn’t show up.

How pathetic! You wouldn’t recognize the truth even if slapped you in the face, you’d probably just enjoy the excuse for another pity party.
The thin line between obsession and insanity is non-existent, because you’re fighting so hard to hold on to what you’ve already lost. The devil need not teach you to die, you’re the master of your own downfall but of course he’ll take the credit!

Who are you?
Are you just a name, that evokes anger from the hottest fires when mentioned?
Are you a lie that can not speak the truth of its deeds?
Has the darkness enveloped you beyond rescue?
Do you even care that you’re not who you are meant to be, but rather a shadow darker than the shadow you cast? Dead on the inside, yielding lifeless fruits that bring out the worst in what ought to be good.

You are nothing but all you choose to be, but to me you are just skin and bones!

You are not entitled

You are not entitled

Dear Artist,

You are not entitled

You are not entitled to anything on the mere basis of talent. Your natural gifts do not afford you the pleasures of life without hardwork, passion and commitment, as well as a good attitude.

It’s sad to see how talented artists in Nigeria waste away because they lack one or all of these things.

Now let’s start by acknowledging a few things that serve as a point of justification and defence. Yes, we know that pursuing a career in the arts is tough and takes forever to pay, yes we know you need the money because times are hard and of course, it is understood that dancers are not given their true worth but guess what; this happens everywhere in the world, movies have sold you gloss but the truth is, the struggle is real every where.

This doesn’t give you right of passage because you have it tough. Everything good in life comes with huge sacrifices, that have to be paid. Those that excel are the ones that understand this, your gift is to be honed, shared and given freely before you can receive. Like a seed sown into the soil, you must wrestle with the sand to bloom like a flower. 

Sadly, many an artist want to just become the flower without going through process. ‘Hian!’

If that were the case, everyone ought to have ‘hammered’ by now. But let’s not digress.

Talent is not enough, this can’t be emphasized any more than this. All talent gives you is a head start, you have to put in the work, go the extra mile to make something of it and succeed. If you claim to have passion for the talent God has freely given to you, then you have to have the discipline to train and hone it to perfection, the humility to learn from others and serve and the patience and commitment towards becoming the best version  of you.

No one can motivate you but you and the people you choose to look up to. Age is not a factor to consider when looking for a teacher or a mentor, experience and expertise is.

You must learn to maximize your strengths and daily grow and learn by outsourcing your weaknesses. Chei! Grammar!

Here’s what I mean: So you think you can dance right, baddest Naija lyrical hiphop dancer ever liveth etc etc but you suck at Naija styles and you know you need to learn. Pick the closest person to you with that skill, swallow a huge drop of humility and learn. Learn till you are as badass as your teacher or good enough to continue on your own. If you believe in value exchange, when you’re done learning, offer to teach your baddest hiphop too. Win, win for all.

Your attitude to work and opportunities determine how far you go as an artist. But first you need to have your priorities in check, if money is your inspiration then this isn’t particularly for you, but if your goal is artistry, mastering your craft, teaching it to people and creating a body of work exportable to any country in the world, then listen up.

You have to pay in time, service and your own funds to grow. Pay for training, volunteer to perform at platforms that will give you the kind of visibility you want and work with people who can move you forward.

READ! Artists seem to hate this word, not all but quite alot. You have to do research to grow, you can’t just rely on what you know. The internet is your friend but are you using it to your advantage?

Attitude. Every human being has an ego. Artists seem to blessed with robes of ego laced with pride and a crown of rudeness. *pauses for effect*

It’s the hard cold truth but we forget that these things do not help us and when displayed, only belittle us and what we have to offer.

People do not patronise pride, it doesn’t pay the bills and it is a bad investment but if that is what comes with your art then you will deprive yourself of greatness. The truth is a bitter pill to swallow but we must see it for what it is, the truth.

As artists we are too sensitive, too quick to take offence or be on the defensive. Too quick to judge but we hate criticism. Creating ‘beef’ that can feed a nation because you don’t want to be told what to do. Here’s my question, ‘ Who E EPP?’ At the end of the day, work is work and play is play, if you can’t tell the difference then, it’s your problem to deal with and nobody else’s.

On a lighter yet serious note, in order to be taken seriously in an industry of this nature, you must respect yourself and work ten times harder than anyone else. Throw your heart and soul into it, fight for what you love. It’s a harsh environment to live in, Nigeria that is, and it isn’t as conducive or structured enough for the arts industry but let that not become the excuse to do a sloppy job. Work your butt off and become the best, you may have been unappreciated and treated wrongly but never let it break you but build you.

Your response to your situation determines how far you go in life. So don’t give up, this art will pay if you put in the work and you will never regret pursuing your passion.

This comes from a place of truth, we would never grow without it

Yours,

An artist

Movie Review: Lion

Movie Review: Lion

Sometimes I wish I could have direct access to the people who inspire me, just so I can let them know just how much of an impact they’ve made.

Sadly, with celebrities you get pegged as a fan girl and would probably never get the chance. But that’s not why we are here.

I just got round to watching Lion.

Lion
Lion

It first caught my attention when Sunny Pawar’s interviews popped up on some of my favourite Bollywood review channels. Then, I watched Dev Patel and Octavia Spencer’s ‘Actor on Actor ‘ and knew it was a movie that was my calling name.

Alone and ready, I started the journey of this movie which ironically started with a journey. It took us through the hustle of brothers making ends meet on the roads of Ganesh Thalai. Soroo was young and eager to prove to his older brother, Guduu that he was tough enough to share the responsibilities of the home.

The love between them was evident and infectious. They had nothing yet loved each other as though they had everything. Guduu was protective, Soroo was determined. Their mum, a labourer, did all she could for the three children she had but could not afford to raise.

An unseen turn of events, changed all their lives forever. 

Lost at a train station, after insisting on accompanying Gudu on night ‘waka’, Soroo ends up locked in a train on a destination to nowhere. No education, no identity or clear idea of where he came from, Soroo went from abandoned, to street urchin to orphan. Despite his attempts, he could not find his way home and accepted his fate when adoption came knocking.

Nicole Kidman  played his adopted mother and both parents loved him unconditionally. Love was all the movie was about till Soroo was jolted to his past by an incident at a mini-indian party thrown by friends. The journey to finding himself after 25 years was a rollercoaster of emotions,deep and heavy, yet till the end we went with Soroo until he found himself and his family.

The beauty of the movie lay in the silences, the nuances and raw expression of selfless love. A love that exists but have forgotten how to share. A love that is blind to prejudice, race or country. A love that is there to give and receive. A love that just is.

Sunny Pawar is a child with a natural gift. I fell in love with his character before I could analyse it, lol. He broke through every emotion I owned by baring himself in the movie and playing it with innocence and zest.

Nicole Kidman breathed a life into this movie I had never seen before, the role hurt yet embraced my heart as her truth behind adoption gave me tears of grief and hope.

This is the world we should be living in, not the chaos we have chosen.

But Dev Patel had me from his first scene to to his last. Being lost is something I have experienced but this, this was a depth I had not seen coming. It was raw, confused, intense and real. I went through every emotion with him and at the end of the movie, with tears running my face, I was found.

A shared victory, I’d say.

Though I would have loved to see Nawazzudine Siddiqui a little more, the movie’s flawlessness left me perfectly happy.

I could go on and on but the movie was definitely worth every single Oscar nomination it got. In a world where sex is a sin and war is holy (Alicia Keys) Lion brings love that evicts all else.

I’m going with 4/5

 

The Adventures of Isys Drain: There is a Lunatic in every town

The Adventures of Isys Drain: There is a Lunatic in every town

There is a Lunatic in every town

I figured it would be kind of weird to write about something you are responsible for because you don’t get the chance to be an actual spectator but I guess despite the view I got, it was my adventure nonetheless.

‘There is A Lunatic in every town’ is a collection of poetry by my dear friend Bash Amuneni and is his first book. It is a book that appeals to the senses and brings to light the truth behind an average Nigerians state of mind, the socio political state of our country and the emotions we lay bare before one another. Each poem is like a piece of a puzzle and I was honoured to have read the manuscript and also plan the launch.

I had told Bash this event had to be different from what people were used to and as a spoken word artist he had to do justice to his craft. To my pleasure he gave me creative freedom and with each day, we worked hard to bring his book to life.

We hand picked some of the most talented people in Abuja to  take the stage and by the day of launch, amidst all the things running through my head, I was sure it would be a hit and it was.

From an array of poets doing pieces from the book to singers and instrumentalists birthing songs of the same name, the art that flowed was more than words could describe. When the words would not seize, dance took over and love was birthed in the piece called ‘These things you do to me’. As the end drew near, I was ecstatic and when it was my turn to sing I was happy and I let it rip. ( modesty would do a grave injustice to the show,lol)

At the end of it all, it was a success (despite the hitches). Books and tees were sold, contacts were shared, donations were made and I could breathe at last. The madness of the whole project proved that Bash was right, indeed ‘There is a Lunatic in every town’. 

An Open Letter to Don Jazzy

An Open Letter to Don Jazzy

Dear Don Jazzy,

http:/isysdrain.wordpress.com/donjazzy
Don Jazzy

I happen to be a huge fan of your work as business man and a lover of music mostly. You have proven that you genuinely know how to run a record label properly, despite the constraints Nigeria and its entertainment industry has but that’s not what this is about.

You have conquered mainstream, first with D’banj, who had no idea how much value you were adding to his career and then with the likes of Tiwa and Dr Sid. You took on the next generation and slayed with your triplets, Korede, Reekado and Dija, though I feel Reekado could use a bigger push and Dija is yet find herself fully. Nonetheless, no one could’ve pulled it off the way you did, so #wehdonesir

This letter however is about the new genres you are about to dabble into. The alternative music scene. It’s not about noisemakers and headbanging jams, it’s about quality content, depth and a true appreciation of the essence of music. I know you love music, it’s written all over your face when you talk about it.

I choose to believe this was a smart business move because you saw an opportunity in the market with alternative music and pray you make the most of it.

All I ask is that you stay true to the sound of the artists you’ve signed and by artists, I mean Johnny Drille and Poe.

Both Johnny and Poe are unique and extremely talented. If packaged and managed well they have the potential to change the game completely. Producers like Atta Lennel Otigba and Cobhams would know exactly what to do to bring out the best in them and there’s a huge niche market awaiting good content like that.

But what do I know? I’m just a music critic, talent manager and PR somborri. You’re the music mogul, I just want to still be able to listen to Johnny and Poe, whether they are with Mavin or not because I’m a die hard fan of both.

Who knows, maybe someday I’ll get to meet you, Don Baba Jay. For now accept my plenty grammar and keep being a baddo. The industry needs you

Lots of love,

Isys Drain