The Abuja Syndrome

Have you ever lived in a place where everyone happens to be related to a senator, minister, admiral, Colonel and even the President? I wonder if all these dignitaries recognize their relatives who cling to their authority by blood, association and of course ‘famzing’ *scratches head*

In Abuja, everyone believes they’re of high class including the wannabe’s that trickle out of the middle and lower clusters of life…
Not to mention the nobody’s who are truly clueless as to what high class actually is *smh*
It’s infuriating to watch as people with little or nothing to offer, strut around demanding attention while a hot iron seems to rest peacefully up their rear ends *sigh*.
Abuja produces snobbery that out does the British to whom the concept belongs, the only difference being Nigerians inability to imitate the politeness and manners that accompany the noses lifted in the air, such minute details are passed down to servants and guards to apply to their own personal grooming.


How can people thrive on such grounds without imploding? Man after all is meant to be a social being and not a plastic can with nothing but pride to fill it up, you know.
What sickens and perhaps baffles me is the response to entertainment, here in Abj (the supposed land of plenty). You see everyone hiding in VIP getting sweaty while bumping and grinding in a night club, but when concerts and shows are to be attended, the noses go up, fake nails come out and the hands become too heavy to clap, let alone a full on applause for the acts who are slaving away trying appease them (and this is if they deem the event worthy of attendance in the first place).
Oh how I felt for the hosts of Runway 2012 and AYE Awards 2013, as they were dishing out gallons of sweat in an attempt to catch the attention of the silent crowd. You could literally hear a pin drop after every joke, some mc’s even resulted to begging for applause pulling out every trick they had up their sleeves, poor guys…

You would think this attitude would be dropped at the church doorstep to worship God in fullness (niceness) and truth but nu-uhn, that indeed would be an insult to the trend. The noses go up even higher and the length of rod now slightly protruding from the posterior becomes a hindrance for dancing or clapping in praise to the Lord! (May He have mercy upon us!) When the Pastor says ‘turn to your neighbor and say amen’, no one turns they just say ‘Amen Pastor’ (I don’t look at people who aren’t as awesome as I am but ‘Amen’) *smh* …

A new comer to Abuja is taken by the view but lost in the crowd and alone for months, no one willing to accommodate you or make friends, just clusters of cliques basking in self-acclaimed importance, leaving you to swim with sharks (if you find any).

Change starts with one person at a time and I truly hope Abuja loosens up to enjoy the full potential of being an openly social society, abi you never tire to dey form?


8 thoughts on “The Abuja Syndrome

  1. Oh the webs we weave…

    Couldn’t have said it any better myself. Awesome way to capture the irrational portrayal of the “Upper East Side”


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