My head hurts, my eyes are sore, my nose is running and my heart is bleeding.
I’ve been sitting in my tub for hours, the bath water has gone cold, the bubbles gone and the bottle of vodka half empty. I can barely feel anything but the pain in my heart and head.
My break up song is on repeat and I am staring blindly at the tiled wall of my bathroom.
It is over. The love story i’d written with no end has written it’s on ending. I am single again after three years of functioning as we, a part of a whole, a lover to a lover.
All that is over!
The tears are running down my cheeks uncontrollably as I sit in the cold soapless tub.
It’s funny how this happened. We hadn’t fought, things were fine, better than ever even.
It doesn’t make sense, it just doesn’t.
I lean my head against the cold tiles and drift into a fitful sleep.
*** *** *** *** ***
‘Tee get up’, ‘get up’
I groan, my head still hurts and it seems as though my name is ringing in my head too. ‘Tee’ I feel an arm go around me and lift me out of the tub. I make a weak attempt to hold on, eyes firmly shut. I feel myself being lowered on to the bed, I’m tucked in and I go back to sleep.
I don’t know how long i’ve been out for. The smell of pepper soup wafts to my nose and I turn over slowly. I touch my head lightly and sit up.
‘How d’you feel?’ I open my eyes. Bad idea, the light is too bright and the headache doubles instantly. I place the pillow over my face till I hear the click of the lights go off.
I stare into the dark, ‘what are you doing here?’ I ask quietly, my voice hoarse from all the crying.
‘I’m your best friend, I’m supposed to be here’ he says as he sits beside me. I bury my head between my knees and start crying all over again. I slowly sink into the sheets and I cry myself back to sleep as Oche watches helplessly by my side.